Taking a Risk.

April 28Th, 2010.

If you know me, you know my brother means the world to me. You would know that he is my everything in life. He is in 5Th grade and we are 4 years apart. I don't live with him anymore (and it kills me) and i never get to talk to him. I called him today and only got to talk to him for a second. I found out that he will have to repeat the 5Th grade because my dad and my step mother don't believe that he can get his grades up in 8 weeks. They are always putting him down and never telling him he does a good job. That was my job when i lived there. I was always telling him he could do it. He has ADHD and a learning disability. He has a hard time learning things and remembering things. So i try to help him. He is really good at all school subjects but he needs to focus more. He needs more attention then he gets. (I think)

When I called my little brother my dad picked up the phone. He asked me why did i hang up on Michelle(Step mom) when she picked up the phone. I hung up when the phone went to the awsering machine. She was yelling in the back round at my dad. She is the biggest bitch that i have ever met. When I talked to my little brother he told me that he couldn't come up for the summer. I was so angry. I knew something like this would happen because every time i want him to visit me it never happens. But whatever. I am so used to it. I am so happy that my boyfriend is in my life. He is here with me threw thick and thin. He held me while i cried and he gave me kisses and hugs. They both mean the world to me. I love them so much. He is always there. It is funny. When i cry my brother always does the same thing as my boyfriend. He comes in my bedroom and gives me a hug and kisses my cheat. They both wipe my tears off and tell me they love me. I love them both.

My brother and i used to fight a lot. Now we don't. Its not likely that we fight anymore. It is because we have gotten older and more mature. Anyways. I love him more then anything in the world. Everyone in my family means the world to me. Sometimes I feel like I am doing something wrong when I say something. For example, when i left the house my dad and step mom were yelling at me saying that it was my fault and that i did it to myself and my brother is going to miss me and i am going to regrate it. I have no clue what i did but i guess everything i do is wrong... Im not doing a pitty thing but sometimes... i hate my life.